I've been having a frustrating day. No, week. Month. Actually, it's an issue that has always been present, it just "flares up" more from time to time. When it flares up, it skews my view of my kids, myself, almost my whole life. I guess that sounds dramatic, but it's how I feel from time to time.
Caleb is my little buddy. He worships the ground I walk on. In his eyes, I can do no wrong. According to him, I make the bed good. My hair "wooks" good. He actually thanks me after I wipe him in the bathroom. He holds the door for me when I unload groceries, without being asked. He is all hugs and kisses to me. His name is the literal word for "dog" and carries the idea of faithfulness. That's Caleb. If anybody crosses me, they better watch out. They will have 30 lbs and 32 inches comin' at them.
Gracie on the other hand, seems like she is always out to prove me wrong. She loves letting me know when I forget things. She loves correcting me if I misquote someone. She is a know-it-all, and loves to be the boss. Sometimes I feel like she's just waiting to throw me under the bus. The problem is, we are too much alike. We both have strong personalities, and as a result, we butt heads a lot, and it makes homeschooling really difficult sometimes.
Just this morning, she was working on a craft. She tried to glue something, turn it over, and then color it. The glue was running everywhere, and she was frustrated. I tried to show her that she had to let the glue dry, and I got excuses why it would work the way she planned. I told her to practice piano, and when I corrected her hand position, (at her teacher's request!) I got excuses why it was too hard that way. And so it goes for most of our life- if I correct handwriting, she says she's doing it the way her teacher in public school showed her- if I correct math, she will explain that, in fact, when she used the counters, the sum WAS nine. She is so very worried about being wrong, that she will just give up and not try. If she doesn't know an answer immediately, she doesn't want to think through and venture a guess. She wants to to be right. She cannot, she WILL NOT, be wrong. And it gets under my skin like nothing else. It makes me angry, and disappointed. It makes me want to scream and punish.It makes me feel like a horrible teacher, and a horrible mom. It makes me feel like giving up and sending her to school.
But then I think, What would that solve? What would that teach her, except, "yeah mom is wrong and you need a school and teacher to learn things"? Or worse, "mom gave up on me"? As frustrating as it is, I think it shows that she needs homeschooling more, so she can learn to respect me. And I think she does, for the most part. I think the problem is maybe more about herself than me. I think she has a pride problem. I think she's also a perfectionist and being wrong embarrasses her. I think as she matures and grows in the Lord she will learn, as I did, that she doesn't know everything, and she'll experience the freedom that realization brings. I think I'm probably an easy target for her know-it-all-ness. I think we all probably treat our moms the worst of anyone in our lives, because we know they are the one person, the only person, who will truly love and accept you just the way you are. The only person who will forgive you for all the times you dump on them.Your dad, your siblings, your spouse- they all have their limits. But your mom never moves, no matter how hard you push her.
I don't have the solution. There probably isn't one. This is who Gracie is, and this is who I am, and all we can do is work through times like this. Deep down I know I'm not a failure, but I sure do feel that way sometimes. And I know Gracie loves me and looks up to me in a lot of ways. But she can frustrate me so quickly!
Ironically, Gracie being proud keeps me humble, and Gracie being a know-it-all shows me...I don't know-it- all.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Monday, April 25, 2011
Practical Tips
One of the most challenging aspects of homeschooling is not finding curriculum or making space in your home for the books, it's simply fitting it all in. You're a mom, so you already have meals to cook and bathrooms to clean, errands to run and laundry to fold. Throw teaching into the mix, and something's gotta give. While I'm not even close to perfecting a system, here's what I'm finding helps the most.
Get up earlier than the kids
A lot of moms do this anyway, but this was the most challenging for me. When I started in September, I had a five month old baby who wasn't sleeping through the night. I took all the sleep I could get. He sleeps good now, but his brother still gets up about 6:30 every morning. Beating the kids out of bed is not easy for me, but it's always worth it. Even if I accomplish nothing but getting dressed and having coffee, I feel like I'm a step ahead the rest of the day.
Make the kids do their share
My kids have chores to do every day but Sunday. They're easy tasks, but they save me time. They make their beds and put their jammies away. They clear the table after meals.They feed the animals and Gracie cleans the bathroom sink. Caleb helps match socks and Gracie folds towels. We also have a rule that all their toys stay in their bedroom to keep the rest of the house neat.
Complete at least one load of laundry every day
Laundry is a constant thorn in my side. There's always so much of it! I have a bad habit of washing four loads, piling them up, and ignoring them for days. Instead of waiting until the hamper is full, I've been doing one load from washing to folding every day. It only takes a few minutes to fold and everything is where we need it so we're not digging for that missing sock Sunday morning.
Work with your schedule, not against it
The first thing people seem to say about homeschoolers after "they get no socialization" is they're "lazy and don't start school till ten o' clock". Well call me super-lazy, but we don't start till one, because that's when Luke takes a nap! In September we were starting at nine. The whole time I was trying to teach Gracie I was also trying to feed and pacify a very needy baby. I was back and forth between Gracie and Luke, giving neither of them my full attention. The result: everyone was frustrated, except Caleb who just does his own thing most of the time... I quickly realized we would be better off waiting till Luke went to sleep instead of trying to force it because that's when you're "supposed" to start. Now we have two solid hours to focus, and by the time he wakes up, Gracie is working on things she can do independently.
Do all your shopping/errands on one day
Instead of running to the store as I need things, I'm learning to plan out trips better so I can go out once a week instead of several small trips. If I need to go grocery shopping, I'll also return library books...stop at the post office...that kind of stuff. If I run out, I'm learning to just do without it for a few days. Jeremiah does have to stop for milk on the way home, but going once saves time and energy, not to mention gas!
Multi-task
Even though I have Luke's nap time set aside for school, I'm not sitting by Gracie's side every second. I learned early on that watching a first grader complete math problems is like watching paint dry. So now I use that time to straighten up the kitchen. I sit and teach her, then when she does the exercises, I start cleaning. The dining room is right off the kitchen, so she can still talk to me and I stop whenever she needs a hand. But it gives me a chance to get stuff done, and teaches her to do her work without me hanging over her shoulder.
Don't let homeschooling define you
There's a difference between "a homeschooling family" and "a family that homeschools". It's very possible to become consumed by it. You want to do a good job, you don't want to be judged, so you pour all your thoughts and energy into until there's nothing left over. I know a family in which the mom got so obsessed with homeschooling they almost got divorced. She ignored her husband because she was always making lesson plans and craft projects.When they did spend time together she wanted to talk about homeschooling. It's important to remember that you're a family, not a school. You have a life to live, and education should flow as a natural part of it, not dictate your every move. So don't worry if you want to take a day off, take advantage of nice weather or a visit from friends. Isn't that part of the reason we want to homeschool in the first place? I for one want to enjoy my kids while they're young, and while I do enjoy watching them learn, I also enjoy watching them play, relax, and be silly. I enjoy watching them be kids. And when they're grown, I don't want them to think of me as a good teacher. I want them to think of me as a good mom.
Get up earlier than the kids
A lot of moms do this anyway, but this was the most challenging for me. When I started in September, I had a five month old baby who wasn't sleeping through the night. I took all the sleep I could get. He sleeps good now, but his brother still gets up about 6:30 every morning. Beating the kids out of bed is not easy for me, but it's always worth it. Even if I accomplish nothing but getting dressed and having coffee, I feel like I'm a step ahead the rest of the day.
Make the kids do their share
My kids have chores to do every day but Sunday. They're easy tasks, but they save me time. They make their beds and put their jammies away. They clear the table after meals.They feed the animals and Gracie cleans the bathroom sink. Caleb helps match socks and Gracie folds towels. We also have a rule that all their toys stay in their bedroom to keep the rest of the house neat.
Complete at least one load of laundry every day
Laundry is a constant thorn in my side. There's always so much of it! I have a bad habit of washing four loads, piling them up, and ignoring them for days. Instead of waiting until the hamper is full, I've been doing one load from washing to folding every day. It only takes a few minutes to fold and everything is where we need it so we're not digging for that missing sock Sunday morning.
Work with your schedule, not against it
The first thing people seem to say about homeschoolers after "they get no socialization" is they're "lazy and don't start school till ten o' clock". Well call me super-lazy, but we don't start till one, because that's when Luke takes a nap! In September we were starting at nine. The whole time I was trying to teach Gracie I was also trying to feed and pacify a very needy baby. I was back and forth between Gracie and Luke, giving neither of them my full attention. The result: everyone was frustrated, except Caleb who just does his own thing most of the time... I quickly realized we would be better off waiting till Luke went to sleep instead of trying to force it because that's when you're "supposed" to start. Now we have two solid hours to focus, and by the time he wakes up, Gracie is working on things she can do independently.
Do all your shopping/errands on one day
Instead of running to the store as I need things, I'm learning to plan out trips better so I can go out once a week instead of several small trips. If I need to go grocery shopping, I'll also return library books...stop at the post office...that kind of stuff. If I run out, I'm learning to just do without it for a few days. Jeremiah does have to stop for milk on the way home, but going once saves time and energy, not to mention gas!
Multi-task
Even though I have Luke's nap time set aside for school, I'm not sitting by Gracie's side every second. I learned early on that watching a first grader complete math problems is like watching paint dry. So now I use that time to straighten up the kitchen. I sit and teach her, then when she does the exercises, I start cleaning. The dining room is right off the kitchen, so she can still talk to me and I stop whenever she needs a hand. But it gives me a chance to get stuff done, and teaches her to do her work without me hanging over her shoulder.
Don't let homeschooling define you
There's a difference between "a homeschooling family" and "a family that homeschools". It's very possible to become consumed by it. You want to do a good job, you don't want to be judged, so you pour all your thoughts and energy into until there's nothing left over. I know a family in which the mom got so obsessed with homeschooling they almost got divorced. She ignored her husband because she was always making lesson plans and craft projects.When they did spend time together she wanted to talk about homeschooling. It's important to remember that you're a family, not a school. You have a life to live, and education should flow as a natural part of it, not dictate your every move. So don't worry if you want to take a day off, take advantage of nice weather or a visit from friends. Isn't that part of the reason we want to homeschool in the first place? I for one want to enjoy my kids while they're young, and while I do enjoy watching them learn, I also enjoy watching them play, relax, and be silly. I enjoy watching them be kids. And when they're grown, I don't want them to think of me as a good teacher. I want them to think of me as a good mom.
The Good, the Bad, and the Boring
As our "school year" is winding down and I find myself starting to look ahead to second grade (wow did I really just type that?!) I've been thinking about the things that worked and things that didn't...
Our math curriculum has been awesome. So much better than I expected. We used Modern Curriculum Press and I will definitely get the second grade book. It uses a mastery approach, so the student fully understands one concept before they start the next, but they also review the concepts so they don't forget.
Phonics, on the other hand, has been a drag. We used "Adventures in Phonics" from Christian Liberty Press and it is the most boring book ever written. Not adventurous at all. I dread it, so I can't imagine how much more Gracie does. You literally do the EXACT same exercises on every page, only with different letters/digraphs. I thought it was good at first, because it taught the rules and seemed really thorough. But as the year went on, it dragged...and dragged...and dragged...I can't wait to be done with this book. I would quit it now, but after doing it this long, it's kind of pointless. I am almost decided on Abeka for Language Arts next year, because they seem to have a more interesting approach and they include spelling with it. I also really like their readers. I shied away from Abeka at first because so many people said it's too "text-booky", but I don't see any way around that for Language Arts or Math.
We started the year with Five in a Row, and I have mixed feelings about it. I love the stories, the kids love the stories, and I love how every thing ties together. I also love that you can customize it and do the projects that work for you. However, halfway through, I stopped being able to find the books. Our library just doesn't have some, at any branch, so my only option is to order them. But...some of them are out of print! One book costs $40 used on Amazon! I also kind of felt like there were holes...with one book you could study China, with another Ohio... it was fun, but I felt like it jumped around, lacked continuity. I'm thinking of just using the book list next year as extra reading instead of the core curriculum, and not worrying about the books I can't find.
I used Christian Light Education for Bible. Actually, I ordered their Science and Social Studies too, but they were so awful I abandoned them after a few lessons. There was nothing to them. It seemed like preschool level work. There were about five sentences to read and maybe three questions. Science started with colors. "Name some things that are red" Seriously? My kids did that when they were two.
Bible seemed a little better. It was kind of dry but not too bad. Until this week when I tried to find the Easter story and discovered they completely left it out! It went from Jesus' miracles to his ascent into heaven. I was pretty disappointed and will be searching for something else next year.
History is tricky for me. I love History, I just don't know where to start! Do you start with America? do you start with the Garden of Eden? It's also still hard for Gracie to grasp the concept of the past. She understands things happened before, but she can't quite get the idea of "a thousand years ago" yet. In place of History we've worked on Geography and map skills, which has been really fun. We're using "Daily Geography" from Evan Moore. It starts with maps of rooms, schoolyards, streets, and moves on to the U.S. and the globe. Then there are exercises to locate things on the maps using directions and a compass. Pretty cool. I'm thinking of expanding it next year and working out some unit studies for each country.
I think the highlight of the year has been the classes at the Wetlands Institute. We go once a month and it costs $8. Gracie enjoys it and has really learned a lot ( I have too!). It jump started a lot of interests that we were able to dig into more at home and I hope they offer it again next year. I'm also planning on using Apologia Science next year.
So I'm pretty much scrapping everything but Math...I had hoped to be more "settled" by this point, but at least now I know what doesn't work. I feel like I have a better idea of what to get for next year, and I'm excited about finding better books and curricula.
Just as I wrote that, I realized how important that is...that I'm excited. One year is almost done, and I'm not discouraged or burned out. Not everything worked, but overall, homeschooling worked, otherwise we would be frustrated and ready to give up. All things considered- what more could you ask for?
But if you have curriculum suggestions, keep 'em coming!
Our math curriculum has been awesome. So much better than I expected. We used Modern Curriculum Press and I will definitely get the second grade book. It uses a mastery approach, so the student fully understands one concept before they start the next, but they also review the concepts so they don't forget.
Phonics, on the other hand, has been a drag. We used "Adventures in Phonics" from Christian Liberty Press and it is the most boring book ever written. Not adventurous at all. I dread it, so I can't imagine how much more Gracie does. You literally do the EXACT same exercises on every page, only with different letters/digraphs. I thought it was good at first, because it taught the rules and seemed really thorough. But as the year went on, it dragged...and dragged...and dragged...I can't wait to be done with this book. I would quit it now, but after doing it this long, it's kind of pointless. I am almost decided on Abeka for Language Arts next year, because they seem to have a more interesting approach and they include spelling with it. I also really like their readers. I shied away from Abeka at first because so many people said it's too "text-booky", but I don't see any way around that for Language Arts or Math.
We started the year with Five in a Row, and I have mixed feelings about it. I love the stories, the kids love the stories, and I love how every thing ties together. I also love that you can customize it and do the projects that work for you. However, halfway through, I stopped being able to find the books. Our library just doesn't have some, at any branch, so my only option is to order them. But...some of them are out of print! One book costs $40 used on Amazon! I also kind of felt like there were holes...with one book you could study China, with another Ohio... it was fun, but I felt like it jumped around, lacked continuity. I'm thinking of just using the book list next year as extra reading instead of the core curriculum, and not worrying about the books I can't find.
I used Christian Light Education for Bible. Actually, I ordered their Science and Social Studies too, but they were so awful I abandoned them after a few lessons. There was nothing to them. It seemed like preschool level work. There were about five sentences to read and maybe three questions. Science started with colors. "Name some things that are red" Seriously? My kids did that when they were two.
Bible seemed a little better. It was kind of dry but not too bad. Until this week when I tried to find the Easter story and discovered they completely left it out! It went from Jesus' miracles to his ascent into heaven. I was pretty disappointed and will be searching for something else next year.
History is tricky for me. I love History, I just don't know where to start! Do you start with America? do you start with the Garden of Eden? It's also still hard for Gracie to grasp the concept of the past. She understands things happened before, but she can't quite get the idea of "a thousand years ago" yet. In place of History we've worked on Geography and map skills, which has been really fun. We're using "Daily Geography" from Evan Moore. It starts with maps of rooms, schoolyards, streets, and moves on to the U.S. and the globe. Then there are exercises to locate things on the maps using directions and a compass. Pretty cool. I'm thinking of expanding it next year and working out some unit studies for each country.
I think the highlight of the year has been the classes at the Wetlands Institute. We go once a month and it costs $8. Gracie enjoys it and has really learned a lot ( I have too!). It jump started a lot of interests that we were able to dig into more at home and I hope they offer it again next year. I'm also planning on using Apologia Science next year.
So I'm pretty much scrapping everything but Math...I had hoped to be more "settled" by this point, but at least now I know what doesn't work. I feel like I have a better idea of what to get for next year, and I'm excited about finding better books and curricula.
Just as I wrote that, I realized how important that is...that I'm excited. One year is almost done, and I'm not discouraged or burned out. Not everything worked, but overall, homeschooling worked, otherwise we would be frustrated and ready to give up. All things considered- what more could you ask for?
But if you have curriculum suggestions, keep 'em coming!
Monday, April 11, 2011
English is Weird
One of the things that worried me most about homeschooling was teaching math.I was never good at it, never enjoyed it, and the thought of trying to teach it to my kids almost prevented me from homeschooling at all. Jeremiah and I even talked about it before we made our decision and came to the conclusion that we may have to "outsource" that subject someday.
English, on the other hand, was my strong point. I've always been a great speller, and consider myself somewhat of a grammarian. I feel a twisted sense of superiority when I find a grammatical error or misspelling in a published work and sometimes amuse myself by mentally correcting a speaker's grammar. When George W. was in office, I was in my element.
The problem is, there's a chasm between knowing something and trying to transfer that knowledge to someone else, and, ironically, I'm finding it much easier to teach Math. Math is made up of facts. Concrete, unchanging. There's a reason for everything, and that reason is usually pretty straightforward and easy to show to someone. English on the other hand, is starting to seem like a lot of mumbo-jumbo. I know how to spell, speak, and write correctly, I just don't always know why. I before E...ever heard of weird?! Why do ought and aught sound the same? We're on modified vowel sounds...are,ear,air,ere,err...they all say "are" as in "square". Do you know what it's like to try to make this make sense to a seven year old?!
Luckily Gracie is reading well and seems to just pick up which sound the modified vowels are making based on context, which in the end I guess is pretty much how everyone learns it unless you're a studying Latin. But every time we sit down for phonics, I'm reminded of this "I Love Lucy" episode. Ricky, you have my sympathies...
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Sick Days
Last week we had a great week of school. We got a lot accomplished in the sense that I could really see areas where Gracie is growing and improving. We had uninterrupted time (which is rare) and she spent a lot of time practicing piano.
Then the kids got sick with hand, foot and mouth. It started with Luke and went down the line with Gracie getting it last. Caleb and Luke also developed ear infections with it. Luke was the worst as he couldn't sleep and for three nights we had a fussy, fevered, sweaty baby in bed keeping us up all night. We were all tired and at the doctor's office every other day with a different kid. Monday morning I told Gracie we weren't having any school.
It made me think back to last year when Gracie was in kindergarten. My kids are usually really healthy, but it seemed as soon as she started school, so did the sickness. We had a horrible winter. Gracie and Caleb both developed a hacking cough and were later diagnosed with RSV. They both had to use inhalers and I had to make phone calls to get the insurance company to cover a chamber to use with it. Caleb had non-stop ear infections and had to visit the ENT specialist to see if he needed tubes put in. I was still pregnant with Luke, and I started with the never-ending cough too. The grand finale came in March when everyone in the family came down with the stomach flu, with Gracie and me ending up in the ER overnight.
But you know what was the worst part of all the illness? School. If Gracie was sick, I had to set the alarm just to wake up to call the school. When I was a kid you just didn't show up, but now you have to call and let them know your kid will be out-as if that changes anything the teacher was planning to do! So after a sleepless night with ear aches and throw ups and changing sheets on the top bunk at 2 am, I had to get out of bed just to make a phone call. Then in the afternoon I had to drive to school, which meant waking a two year old up from his nap and dragging a sick kid out of the house, to pick up her make-up work. It irked me that a KINDERGARTEN student who was sick had make-up work. It was dumb stuff too, cutting and pasting and mindless coloring pages. And it wasn't one or two sheets, it was usually about eight. It was all the day's seat work plus that night's homework.
But since parents are stupid, it wasn't enough for me to decide my kid was sick and write a note to excuse her absence. In order for it to be excused, there had to be a doctor's note for every day she was home. If she was sick Monday, saw the doctor, but still had a fever Tuesday and Wednesday, only Monday was excused. I wasn't smart enough to take her temperature. I'm very much a libertarian and I resented not being able to decide if and when my kid should be home.
Then there were the days Caleb was sick. Gracie still had school, and I had to drag a sick two year old out to drop her off, since there was no bus (not that I would have wanted her on it anyway).
At the end of the year, despite me dutifully calling the school and writing notes, she had something like 12 "unexcused" absences.
So I have to say that sick days are one of my favorite things about homeschooling. If someone's sick, they get to stay home and rest. No phone calls begging permission. No explanatory notes. No scheduling doctor's appointments around school hours. And no work to make-up. We'll just pick up where we left off.
On the flip side, homeschooling works out great when your kid has symptoms that would keep them out of school, but they're still up and running around. You get to play it by ear. If Gracie is sick enough to want to lay down, I let her have off from school work. But if she just has a bad cold but is otherwise pretty happy, we can go on with school work as planned.
Somehow though, no matter where your kid goes to school, mom never gets a sick day...
Then the kids got sick with hand, foot and mouth. It started with Luke and went down the line with Gracie getting it last. Caleb and Luke also developed ear infections with it. Luke was the worst as he couldn't sleep and for three nights we had a fussy, fevered, sweaty baby in bed keeping us up all night. We were all tired and at the doctor's office every other day with a different kid. Monday morning I told Gracie we weren't having any school.
It made me think back to last year when Gracie was in kindergarten. My kids are usually really healthy, but it seemed as soon as she started school, so did the sickness. We had a horrible winter. Gracie and Caleb both developed a hacking cough and were later diagnosed with RSV. They both had to use inhalers and I had to make phone calls to get the insurance company to cover a chamber to use with it. Caleb had non-stop ear infections and had to visit the ENT specialist to see if he needed tubes put in. I was still pregnant with Luke, and I started with the never-ending cough too. The grand finale came in March when everyone in the family came down with the stomach flu, with Gracie and me ending up in the ER overnight.
But you know what was the worst part of all the illness? School. If Gracie was sick, I had to set the alarm just to wake up to call the school. When I was a kid you just didn't show up, but now you have to call and let them know your kid will be out-as if that changes anything the teacher was planning to do! So after a sleepless night with ear aches and throw ups and changing sheets on the top bunk at 2 am, I had to get out of bed just to make a phone call. Then in the afternoon I had to drive to school, which meant waking a two year old up from his nap and dragging a sick kid out of the house, to pick up her make-up work. It irked me that a KINDERGARTEN student who was sick had make-up work. It was dumb stuff too, cutting and pasting and mindless coloring pages. And it wasn't one or two sheets, it was usually about eight. It was all the day's seat work plus that night's homework.
But since parents are stupid, it wasn't enough for me to decide my kid was sick and write a note to excuse her absence. In order for it to be excused, there had to be a doctor's note for every day she was home. If she was sick Monday, saw the doctor, but still had a fever Tuesday and Wednesday, only Monday was excused. I wasn't smart enough to take her temperature. I'm very much a libertarian and I resented not being able to decide if and when my kid should be home.
Then there were the days Caleb was sick. Gracie still had school, and I had to drag a sick two year old out to drop her off, since there was no bus (not that I would have wanted her on it anyway).
At the end of the year, despite me dutifully calling the school and writing notes, she had something like 12 "unexcused" absences.
So I have to say that sick days are one of my favorite things about homeschooling. If someone's sick, they get to stay home and rest. No phone calls begging permission. No explanatory notes. No scheduling doctor's appointments around school hours. And no work to make-up. We'll just pick up where we left off.
On the flip side, homeschooling works out great when your kid has symptoms that would keep them out of school, but they're still up and running around. You get to play it by ear. If Gracie is sick enough to want to lay down, I let her have off from school work. But if she just has a bad cold but is otherwise pretty happy, we can go on with school work as planned.
Somehow though, no matter where your kid goes to school, mom never gets a sick day...
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
The Myth of Me Time
In the top drawer of my jewelry box, I have a scrap of newspaper that reads "Now...it's me time!" I don't remember what it was advertising, but I thought it was really funny and clipped it out. From time to time I leave it somewhere funny or ironic for Jeremiah to find. For instance, if I'm going out and he's staying with the kids I'll leave it behind, kind of like, "so long, sucker!". Other times I'll hand it to him like a get-out-of-jail free card, when the kids are really acting up. It makes us laugh in situations that could turn stressful, but the truth is, I never actually cash it in. I never want to. I don't really need me time.
I used to think I needed me time. As a new mom, I thought that's the way it was. You take care of your precious baby all day, and when your husband comes home it's his turn. He worked hard all day, but you did too. And you gave up a lot for that baby.Your job, your education, your body, your sleep, your free time. You deserved a break. Not every day maybe, but it was your right as a mom to get out often for me time. Maybe shopping, out with friends, whatever you liked, you should get an equal chance to spend some time without the kids. And, me time was good for the whole family, because afterward you would be refreshed and therefore a better mom and wife.
Everyone has hobbies and interests they like to pursue. And sometimes, after the kids have been sick or something really stressful happens in your life, it's nice to get a chance to relax and be able to think. And I think it's good for husbands and wives to get out alone from time to time. The problem with me time, is it's all about "me".
When God first laid it on my heart to homeschool, the thing that I struggled with most was not socialization or if I would do a good job, it was giving up me time. See, I had this picture in my head that eventually all my kids would be in school and I would be alone all day. I was excited about that. I had plans to join the gym, get my nails done, keep my house immaculate, plant beautiful flowers, and stop at Starbucks once a week. The way I figured, all that free time would enable me to do an even better job at home, and everyone would benefit.
I didn't come up with the idea of me time on my own. It was fed to me in parenting books, womens' magazines, TV shows, and conversations. My own mother often tells me, "You need a break". It's a recurring complaint among moms, especially stay-at-home moms. "I just need a break!" "My husband doesn't realize what I go through all day!" "My kids are driving me nuts" "I need a night out...a massage...a day at the beach..." We need time to regroup, pamper ourselves, and feel beautiful again. Moms everywhere are worshiping a false god called "Me Time".
Me Time tells you you deserve more. Me Time tells you you're special. Me Time tells you you're a martyr. Me Time takes the focus off of others, and back on ME. But like all false gods, Me Time won't answer your prayers, and it won't solve your problems. You might feel good while you're out, but in a few days, you'll just want more Me Time.
Because Me Time is one of Satan's lies.Satan doesn't like moms staying home, or homeschooling their kids, and he wants to get us to stop doing what's right for our families, and therefore future generations, and start focusing on ourselves and what we "need". It's not hard to get us to think this way since our sin nature wants us to be on the throne in place of God, and since our society is saturated with the notion of "self".
Like I said, I used to subscribe to that school of thought. But slowly God worked on my heart until I learned how to enjoy my kids. And after I realized it was ok to enjoy them, I stopped feeling the need for so much me time. I still like to use the bathroom alone, but most of the time I'm good. I don't feel the anxiousness, the desperation. I also can't imagine not homeschooling. I would be sad to have them gone for six hours every day.
...through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13
...love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 5:8
...in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Philippians 2:3
...love is patient, love is kind...love bears all things. I Corinthians 13
...If anyone would come after me, let him take up his cross daily and follow me. Luke 9:23
...I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless, I live. Galatians 2:20
There's no me time mentioned in the Bible. But there is a whole lot of love,dying to self, and serving others. When we submit ourselves to God, He meets all our needs, including those for "me time."
but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
I used to think I needed me time. As a new mom, I thought that's the way it was. You take care of your precious baby all day, and when your husband comes home it's his turn. He worked hard all day, but you did too. And you gave up a lot for that baby.Your job, your education, your body, your sleep, your free time. You deserved a break. Not every day maybe, but it was your right as a mom to get out often for me time. Maybe shopping, out with friends, whatever you liked, you should get an equal chance to spend some time without the kids. And, me time was good for the whole family, because afterward you would be refreshed and therefore a better mom and wife.
Everyone has hobbies and interests they like to pursue. And sometimes, after the kids have been sick or something really stressful happens in your life, it's nice to get a chance to relax and be able to think. And I think it's good for husbands and wives to get out alone from time to time. The problem with me time, is it's all about "me".
When God first laid it on my heart to homeschool, the thing that I struggled with most was not socialization or if I would do a good job, it was giving up me time. See, I had this picture in my head that eventually all my kids would be in school and I would be alone all day. I was excited about that. I had plans to join the gym, get my nails done, keep my house immaculate, plant beautiful flowers, and stop at Starbucks once a week. The way I figured, all that free time would enable me to do an even better job at home, and everyone would benefit.
I didn't come up with the idea of me time on my own. It was fed to me in parenting books, womens' magazines, TV shows, and conversations. My own mother often tells me, "You need a break". It's a recurring complaint among moms, especially stay-at-home moms. "I just need a break!" "My husband doesn't realize what I go through all day!" "My kids are driving me nuts" "I need a night out...a massage...a day at the beach..." We need time to regroup, pamper ourselves, and feel beautiful again. Moms everywhere are worshiping a false god called "Me Time".
Me Time tells you you deserve more. Me Time tells you you're special. Me Time tells you you're a martyr. Me Time takes the focus off of others, and back on ME. But like all false gods, Me Time won't answer your prayers, and it won't solve your problems. You might feel good while you're out, but in a few days, you'll just want more Me Time.
Because Me Time is one of Satan's lies.Satan doesn't like moms staying home, or homeschooling their kids, and he wants to get us to stop doing what's right for our families, and therefore future generations, and start focusing on ourselves and what we "need". It's not hard to get us to think this way since our sin nature wants us to be on the throne in place of God, and since our society is saturated with the notion of "self".
Like I said, I used to subscribe to that school of thought. But slowly God worked on my heart until I learned how to enjoy my kids. And after I realized it was ok to enjoy them, I stopped feeling the need for so much me time. I still like to use the bathroom alone, but most of the time I'm good. I don't feel the anxiousness, the desperation. I also can't imagine not homeschooling. I would be sad to have them gone for six hours every day.
...through love serve one another. Galatians 5:13
...love covers a multitude of sins. I Peter 5:8
...in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than themselves. Philippians 2:3
...love is patient, love is kind...love bears all things. I Corinthians 13
...If anyone would come after me, let him take up his cross daily and follow me. Luke 9:23
...I am crucified with Christ, nevertheless, I live. Galatians 2:20
There's no me time mentioned in the Bible. But there is a whole lot of love,dying to self, and serving others. When we submit ourselves to God, He meets all our needs, including those for "me time."
but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:31
Friday, March 18, 2011
Verse Folders
A week or so ago I wrote about some ideas for Scripture memory, so now I'll share the results.
We made "verse folders" using file folders. I have a huge pack I bought at BJ's for something else and now I'm trying to make good use of them. They're proving to be quite handy to have around.
First I printed out pages from http://www.homeschoolcreations.com/SparksAwanaVerses.html/.
I chose Ephesians 4:32 because there were some, um, "squabbles" that week. The kids cut them out and glued them in the folders. The pages were already colored so I let the kids decorate the folders.
After that we put them into binders and wrote the reference on the tab, so they have their own "files".
(this one is Caleb's)
I stapled a sandwich bag inside and put the verse scramble papers in it. At first I thought we would glue them on construction paper as a quiz at the end of the week, but by keeping them in the bag Gracie can review putting them in order again in the future.
The kids really enjoyed it and they both did really well learning the verse. Gracie has it memorized and was able to unscramble all the words.
Caleb learned it pretty well too!
But best of all, they took it to heart. A few days later I noticed Gracie being extra kind to Caleb. I was going to praise her, and before I could, she told me, "Mommy, I'm working hard at being kind". God's Word never returns void.
We made "verse folders" using file folders. I have a huge pack I bought at BJ's for something else and now I'm trying to make good use of them. They're proving to be quite handy to have around.
First I printed out pages from http://www.homeschoolcreations.com/SparksAwanaVerses.html/.
I chose Ephesians 4:32 because there were some, um, "squabbles" that week. The kids cut them out and glued them in the folders. The pages were already colored so I let the kids decorate the folders.
After that we put them into binders and wrote the reference on the tab, so they have their own "files".
I stapled a sandwich bag inside and put the verse scramble papers in it. At first I thought we would glue them on construction paper as a quiz at the end of the week, but by keeping them in the bag Gracie can review putting them in order again in the future.
Caleb learned it pretty well too!
But best of all, they took it to heart. A few days later I noticed Gracie being extra kind to Caleb. I was going to praise her, and before I could, she told me, "Mommy, I'm working hard at being kind". God's Word never returns void.
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